So that the traditional media don't fire you too quickly (if you get hired at all).
Free survival tips for cartoonists
1- You don't delve too much into sensitive issues, but if it is carried by all the media that day, try to tiptoe around it by positioning yourself as close as possible to the editorial line of the house.
2- Always touch on current affairs, but without repeating the subject the next day, they will think you are obsessed with it.
3- Be equidistant from everything. Don't appear to openly support or sympathise with any group or idea. The great masters say that the "notaries" of humour should not be married to anyone or anything (neither chicha nor limonรก, but with the appearance of being intelligent).
Ambiguity is a shield that protects from all evil.
4- That the jokes are always white, leaving the criticism and the distribution of daggers to the director and his columnists, who are the experts on the subject.
5- There is no mention of the very recent dead, never. Nor of some of those of yesteryear. At most something with sentiment.
6- Do not caricature specific businessmen, nor gods or their army of spokespersons, kings and their offspring, much less the editor of your media. If you do, do so only to pay them a warm tribute.
7- The price of the work should never be fixed, the medium will always be the one who sets the price, they are the ones who know the prices of their things.
8- Do not ask for a pay rise, they will think that you are starting to think you are somebody or that you are provoking the dismissal because you are no longer comfortable.
9- Tits, asses, with or without butthole, pussies and dicks and their various combinations of assemblies are absolutely out of the question. Also shit and other hot, viscous substances coming out of the body. Any of these things will put you forever in the showcase of the vulgar.
10- When they suggest that you send another cartoon, don't ask for the reason for the rejection either (the real one, I mean).
11- Make a lot of generic dumb jokes, point 10 will make you need more than one refill.
12. Apologise for anything, for everything. And quickly.
But to be happy, have fun and enjoy your work....
